In an emotional and very real therapy session, Basketball Wives reality star, Evelyn Lozada opened up to life coach Iyanla Vanzant in ways, she didn’t even expect to. This weekend was the premiere of Iyanla Fix My Life on OWN. Iyanla first sat down with Evelyn a few days after her marriage to Chad Johnson, then again after her un-expected allegations of domestic abuse and filing for divorce. The fiesty and often controversial reality star, let her guard down and gave us a glimpse into the life of a woman that is just afraid of losing everything and not being loved. It was very moving and many people finished watching with a different perspective of Evelyn. The most moving part was the end of interview 1 when she apologized for her behavior to Chad’s 3 young daughters and then they all cried. You can tell they really loved her. So sad. (Watch below):
Here are some excerpts from the interview below:
You’ve been rewarded for being out of order and a thug among woman. You got to get that and only you can change it. We have to know what it is gonna cost you to become the truth of who you are. Because it’s gonna cost you. You get paid for that! Will you get paid for being the truth of who you are as a woman in this world?
Evelyn admitted that it would probably cost the show (Basketball Wives) if she didn’t behave that way anymore but she is still willing to make some changes in her life.
Check out a few excerpts plus video of the entire interview below:
Evelyn On why she decided to change her ways [My step-daughters] were really the inspiration for why I had that ‘Ah ha’ moment because when you’re filming, you’re not thinking about who is watching the show. The older one Chade goes ‘I seen when you were on the television..’ you know me throwing the bottle and I was so embarrassed and then I said to myself ‘What is going on?’ and then I joking told them ‘That wasn’t me’ and they were like ‘Yes it was you Evelyn’ and then they thought it was wonderful and them I’m like mortified. I’m like ‘Oh my god’.
On why she threw a bottle [I] was caught up in the moment. Going from 0 to 10. I always say I don’t have a medium. That’s how every woman in my family dealt with conflict. We didn’t sit down and do this! That’s how my life was. That’s how I grew up. […] because my life has always been chaos.
On saying that she didn’t want to be in her ex-friend Jennifer’s presence anymore on the show My girl was publicly doing interviews about me. So I’m on defense mode. I’m actually always on a defense mode because I don’t trust anybody […] I was angry before I got there.
On which day she feels scared the most and what scares her the most Everyday. [What scares me the most is] not being loved. What scares me the most is being by myself. What scares me the most is being by myself not having anything.
[starts crying] You know, being the most successful one out of everyone [in my family] and just being put on this platform and this pedestal it’s just a lot of pressure. I just want to do good […] I love people and know that I feel like I was put in this position for a reason. I just don’t know what that is. You know, I know its not to act the fool on TV.
On giving Chad permission to cheat Me and [Chad] have real open conversations on this lifestyle. This is all I’ve seen being really good friends with other women who are married and in relationships with these men, in this world that I just live in. So many things happen, not just to men, to woman also. You see so much. […] I said if there’s ever a feeling or a thought in your mind that you want to go there I’d rather know about it. I’d rather know about it than him sneak around. If [he] is in a place where he feels like he has a desire to be with someone else or … because I get it, I get what temptation is.
On whether she wants to be married to someone that cheats on her No, absolutely not. I just want to know. Am I wrong for wanting to know?
On what she would do if she found out that he cheated on her Our relationship would be over
On whether shes communicated that to Chad Yes.
On what direction Chad is leading her to [Shakes head]
On whether shes afraid to set boundaries No, I’m not afraid. I think I’m the only person in his life who tells him how it is. It’s tough because when I do say something he says ‘This is how my personality is.. Why do you want me to change?’
On what scares her the most about her marriage That where going to end up divorced like everyone else
On who she believes she is I am Evelyn Lozada, someone that’s becoming a servant of God.
At the end of Part 1, Evelyn met with Chad’s daughters and apologized for not being a good example for them:
[Cries] I just want to tell you guys that I’m sorry for being a bad example. I am now your Step-mother, your dad’s wife and I haven’t always handled things the right way and I don’t want you guys to do what I’ve done. So I am here to tell you that I am sorry for doing that, I want your forgiveness
I really wish the best for Evelyn. What did you think?
Via: OWN, NecoleBitchie